Who Am I? Not A Simple Question.

     Who am I? A question which only consists of three words, but the answer to that sometimes takes a life time to truly find the right answer, or may never. Even in the movie Les Misérables, the character Jean Valjean had so many contradicting and confusing identity when he ask himself this question in one point of his life. In reality, we are often asked the same question during an interview. However is not that hard to answer right? I mean, we already have a pre-plan set of answers to be given with those questions. But we know it ourselves, those are hand-picked good qualities or may even simply made up just for the sake of interview.

     So who am I really? I am, was a timid and shy person. In my childhood, I was never really an outgoing person, I preferred to stay silent and observe my surroundings and the people. As I grew up, I became more outgoing, friendly and interactive with people. I guess you could say exposure contributed to this change, or simply because of puberty. I like to be different too. That is why I learned the er-hu and breakdance, simply because is something you don't see everyday. But at the same time, often I feel like an insecure person. Always worry about things that has room for doubt. Fear of the unknown, unpredictable outcome of an event, or just about anything. I guess you could say I have a strong fear in failure and rejection.

     I am also a person who is strong with his own religion. But at the same time I am not the all-believe everything is linked to spirits. Simply put, I am not a fanatic. Another aspect, I prefer to remain open-minded at all times, to allow myself to challenge any doubt or contradiction I encounter. I guess one of the strong points that I have is I can tolerate with almost anyone. I only get angry once in a blue moon. Any discomfort or something of that sorts, I prefer to keep it to myself. I don't mind having all this burden buried within me. Though one day I hope to let it all out.

     All in all, I would say that I am just a person who dislike troubles. Most of the time I am just a quiet person, and I don't feel fake when I am in that state. Though I am called a social butterfly sometimes, but the truth is, I am simply a quiet and timid person in nature.

Change 123

     'Change 123' was a japanese comic, or we usually refer to it as manga, that I read some time ago. Like any other manga, the hero of the story is usually that type of typical timid, fragile but yet brave and  motivational character. Nothing much to be said of the hero as it is very common and I'm pretty sure it will bored you to death if further explained. However, the highlight of this comic is on the female protagonist. With regard to the title of this manga, the protagonist, by the name of Motoko actually suffers from split personalities, to be more specific, 3 obvious personalities with one hidden dark personality.

     When we think about this type of diagnosis, immediately it comes to our mind is that the person is crazy or insane.  But in this manga, having split personality actually empowers Motoko. Each of the personalities are expert in certain specialty. One would be karate, second a weapon expert, third a grapple, submission martial art style personality. The logic according to the manga for this split personality was the protagonist spent her entire childhood training under three fathers who were legends in the said abilities or skills.Well, i'm sure there are similar cases in reality, children being forced to attend various classes or tuition, as if their life depends on it. However, unlike this manga, these children would most likely end up depress or simply stress out to the point of suicide. 

     Anyway, back to the manga, each time the protagonist is in danger, she would simply change into another personality and beat up which ever criminal who threaten her. I guess if every woman has something like this, the world could be a safer world. Don't you think? But boyfriends and husbands would have to watch out. Another interesting aspect is how the writer came up with the idea of split personalities communicating with one another. For the protagonist, Motoko to understand her different personalities, she communicates with them through a diary. Such a simple yet creative concept.

     All in all, this manga is interesting simply because the way they portray split personality as something good instead of bad. The positive approach to this mental illness is definitely not common thus making this manga more unique than any other comics in terms of originality and concept.

    

Many Mistakes Make A Right!

     After indulging my senses with the movie, Pacific Rim, I head on to The Gardens shopping mall to check out an art gallery that was on displayed. This art gallery was entitled 'Bewildered', featuring art paintings by an artist by the name of Toon Hian. As in any other gallery, the room was almost empty, except it was decorated with various art pieces of Toon Hian, some biography and a table with some books on it. Well, I guess having a room that empty has its reasons, to focus on the paintings!! If an art gallery has television, food stalls and etc, who would be able to keep their eyes on the paintings for long? Well, that is the practical part of an art gallery.

     Now some insight on the painting. Honestly, my mind became confused and twisted as I look at the paintings. Some of the paintings were reflections of his time in Perak, in which Ipoh was one of it. I myself once lived in Ipoh itself, however his paintings and description of the Ipoh I knew was not how I could remember it. I took time trying to figure out and relate with one of the paintings which supposingly describe a part of Ipoh. After awhile I began to realize, why am I trying to relate it to myself? Why not I look from his perspective of how he remembered Ipoh? Wasn't it the purpose of displaying his painting was to show the audience his own interpretation of life or perspective? So rather than knocking myself out relating to it, I try to understand from his perspective.

     Another thing about paintings such as this is that it is not perfect. Jagged lines, patches everywhere, no perfect circle, faces out of form and so on. Anyone would notice if they look close enough at the painting. But one funny thing though. Because everything looks like a mistake, it somehow fits together just right. Why would something that has so much flaws, look so right at the same time. Then I realize, if it was a memory, that would explain all the imperfections. Unlike real-like portrait drawing, Toon Hian's pieces was a reflection, showcase of his memory. How many of us can actually point out every single detail of the memories we had? None I'm sure. Memories are blurry, imperfect. Therefore, I believe the paintings were realistic in it's own way. Real pictures of how memories would look like if they were drawn out.
    

Jack and the Beanstalk

     Jack and the Beanstalk, an interesting fairytale concept which stimulates the imagination of children. To summarize the story briefly, it began when Jack, who was from a poor family went to the market to sell his family's cow to earn some money or food. However, he was offered five magical beans which eventually grew so high that it connects both the world of humans and a family of giants. With this, Jack discovered this family of giant and began to steal precious belonging from the giant and was chased after the third attempt. Finally the beanstalk was chopped and the giant along with it fell to the ground and the giant was killed. As any other fairytale, Jack and the mother lived happily ever after.

      The interesting aspect of this story was that it is logical in some way. At those times, the only thing which could possibly grew so high without much help would be plants. As it was magical beans, it was much believable that such incident could actually occur. If it had been a tower or some sort, then I guess even children would not believe such structure could have been build within a day or so. On the other hand, it allows the imagination of children to expand. For an example, we often do not see the other side of the cloud. So this fairytale portrays possibilities of a world that was hidden above the clouds, waiting to be discovered. Furthermore, it provides excitement and suspense as Jack were exposed to dangerous situations at times. With all this put into place, this fairytale definitely play its role as an adventure story.

      However, if this fairytale was chosen to teach children moral value, I would give a double thumbs down. Why? Simply because the character, Jack, went up to the giant's house three times to steal possession. Yeah, I know he is poor, but wasn't the first bag of gold good enough? To top it, he actually stole a hen which could lay golden egg continuously. Honestly, that was already good enough. But, Jack wasn't satisfy and went up to steal the golden harp. If the giant hadn't came chasing after him, I'm sure Jack would have continue stealing. I'm not sure about you, but it seems like there is an element of greed here. Well, I even pitied the giant, he was killed for trying to claim back his possession, sounds like a victim of snatch thief or robbery don't you think?

     To conclude, the story of Jack and the Beanstalk is a very interesting adventure story. But I personally believe it does not deliver good moral values as compared to stories such as Hansel and Gretel.

Keeper of Secrets

     I travel everyday, to almost every house, collecting unwanted things from people. Things which are deem to be dirty, filthy, useless, unhygienic, just simply disgusting.  Sometimes I use a pair of glove, other times I would collect it with my bare hands. Often this stuff comes in a plastic bag, while some may come in boxes, or even individuals such as a bed. Even some are left at the pathway, expecting me to scrap off every single filth from the ground. Some houses have more, some are just none at all. 

     Most of the time I just see plastic bags, not the people. The only greeting I receive are the squeaks from rats or buzzing from houseflies. I too don't get a word of thanks from humans since I don't see them at all. Many wouldn't want to take my place, unrewarding, unpromising as other occupations. However, there is something I take pleasure in my job.

     Though is true that it is rubbish that I collect, but among the piles of filth... lies the secrets, worries, and memories of every house. Sometimes I would find love letters, most probably discarded from a broken relationship. Beautiful photo albums, marking the end of a generation, a memory or pictures which may be too difficult to look upon again. Bills, indicating the end of unsettled debts. Items which are too embarrassing to be revealed. What I do? I help these individuals, families to remove these once significant or painful moments of their lives. I help them to move on, to let go, taking all of these with me to be discarded forever. 

     You never know how much I can learned from collecting people's rubbish. I don't even have to meet that person to know who he or she is. All I need to do is just look at the rubbish they dispose. Furthermore, I would be the last person, maybe even the only person to know secrets that was kept hidden, before it is finally put to rest forever. Though I am just a garbage collector, but I believe I am a Keeper of Secrets too.